This is the story of Greg, a Bible
and Sunday school teacher at a church called
Hinson, who fell into adulterous sin, and how
Greg, according to God's biblical direction, was admonished
and eventually restored.
The silence of my study was interrupted by
the persistent ringing of the telephone.
A longtime friend from a distant city was
calling and he said, Don, I'm sorry, but
I have some bad news for you.
One of your people has been deeply involved
in sin for many years.
The whole sordid story is just beginning to
surface here, and I thought I'd call you
so that you could deal with it before
it comes to you second hand.
I listened as he described a long series
of events with all the confirming evidence that
was needed.
It was not just one of my people.
It was one of my dear friends.
It was one of my staff that had
fallen.
When he finished, I replaced the phone, sat
in stunned disbelief for a few moments, and
then laid my head on my desk and
cried.
Greg had been on our staff for two
years, in the ministry for 25.
He was unusually gifted, affable, quite successful.
Everyone loved him.
His sphere of ministry had captured the support
and admiration of the entire church.
He was relentless in his determination to succeed,
terribly energetic, one of the hardest working men
that I'd ever met.
We've always placed high priority on the marriage
relationship of our staff people.
Joanna, his wife of more than 28 years,
was a beautiful, gifted, supportive woman.
She appeared to be completely devoted to Greg.
Her quietness never suggested to any of us
that she was withdrawn or unhappy.
It was just characteristic of a meek and
quiet spirit.
Martha and I spent time with Greg and
Joanna and sensed no tension whatever.
Our first impression was very positive, with no
hint of any reservations.
Greg was a handsome and charming man, with
a boyish grin, and was oftentimes quite disarming.
He was a proud father with three grown
children, all of them in Christ and some
of them in Christian ministry.
I loved to pray with him.
Early every Sunday morning, we'd gather in my
office on our knees and commit ourselves and
our ministries to our Heavenly Father, and when
he prayed, I always sensed depth and sincerity.
The ringing telephone and that faraway voice that
early morning shattered more than the stillness in
my quiet office, much more.
My brother, my friend, my colleague in the
ministry was leading a double life and had
been for years, but now it was over,
and his world and ours was about to
come crashing down.
What do we do?
What do I do?
My first impulse was to call Greg into
my office immediately and confront him with the
information I had just received.
I'm so glad I didn't.
I was hurt, I was angry, I was
confused, and that certainly is no time to
confront anyone, especially one who has fallen so
hard and so far.
I thought, I prayed, and then I picked
up the phone and asked Pastor Dick Wahlstrom,
our staff counselor, to come up to my
office.
I related all that I'd learned to a
stunned, disbelieving fellow servant.
The whole story was preposterous, impossible.
Dick and I sat there a long time,
grieving, pondering our options.
We knew some of our alternatives, but perhaps
there were others.
We could ignore the problem and hope for
it to go away.
We could pray and commit it to God
and sidestep human responsibility by waiting for God
to take action.
We could quietly dismiss Greg.
We could publicly dismiss Greg.
We could ask him to submit a resignation
and leave for personal reasons.
We could blow the proverbial whistle on him
and make it impossible for him to ever
serve another church for the rest of his
life.
All of these possibilities and others passed through
our minds and they tumbled over our lips
as we stumbled blindly through a maze of
confused and jumbled thoughts.
We finally concluded that some form of biblical
disciplinary action seemed inevitable.
But first, we needed to confirm the story
that we had just heard.
My friend had given me the names and
phone numbers to call, and two irate husbands,
one of them Greg's close friend, were about
to fly to Portland, confront Greg and then
visit with me.
I called each one.
I listened as their deep hurt and anger
spilled over the telephone.
I listened as they detailed the incidents.
One of them had since divorced his wife.
Her affair with Greg was chiefly responsible.
I heard their threats.
This man has to be dealt with, they
said.
This man needs to be disciplined, to be
removed from the ministry, from the church, in
order to protect the very people to whom
he ministers.
Well, it was at this moment in time,
as I was taking concise notes of everything
that was being said, that I coined a
little phrase.
It was new to me, and I remember
scribbling that little phrase on my notepad.
The words read, the primary purpose of discipline
is restoration, not retribution.
Retribution.
Well, now what do we do?
Sufficient evidence to substantiate the charges had already
been acquired, evidence that pointed again to the
realization that some sort of church disciplinary action
needed to be taken.
I've always felt terribly clumsy walking through any
experience of discipline, whether it be at home
or in the church.
My tendency has either been to overreact, oftentimes
in anger, or to hesitate until any form
of action has completely lost its meaning.
The biblical motive for discipline has always seemed
somewhat unclear to me.
Was discipline to be punitive, protective, corrective, or
restorative?
Or was it to be all of these,
or none of these?
Or was it to be one more than
the others?
It's been extremely awkward for me to find
the sensitive balance between the biblical demands for
purity and the equally powerful biblical commands to
love.
To display the love of God and the
purity of God simultaneously is extremely difficult.
The late Francis Schaeffer has said, if we
show either of these without the other, we
exhibit not the character, but a caricature of
God.
If we stress the love of God without
the holiness of God, it turns out only
to be compromised.
But if we stress the holiness of God
without the love of God, we practice something
that is hard and lacks beauty.
Jesus displayed a beautiful blend of purity and
love in his sensitive dealings with the woman
caught in the act of adultery.
Without compromising the need for purity, he respected
her personhood.
The result was that her accuser's hypocrisy was
substantially rebuked.
The woman repented, sin was forgiven, and a
sinner was restored to a place of dignity
and wholeness with both her Lord and her
community.
But then what do we do?
Dick and I asked probing questions of each
other.
Is there any way that we can avoid
public exposure of this sin?
Is it possible to keep this information from
Greg's wife, from his family?
Can he be restored completely without a resignation
or without any public censure?
How can we publicly discipline a staff man
without hurting the image of the entire church?
How can we begin lifting this man back
onto his feet without crippling him further?
How can we protect him from his own
weakness?
How can we preserve the integrity of the
church and at the same time protect our
members from any further act of immorality?
How can we be true to our Lord
and at the same time sensitive to the
needs of our brother?
Well, both Dick and I were convinced that
whatever was done had to be done right.
There was no room for error.
Hinson's high level of visibility, Greg's popularity among
the people, and our intense desire to see
successful church discipline in action demanded that we
proceed slowly and carefully.
We prayed.
And as we prayed, my own words came
back to me, words that I had spoken
so often, words from really some unknown source,
words to me that had always been profoundly
powerful.
The church is the only army in the
world that has the reputation for deserting its
wounded.
Action had to be taken.
Of this we were convinced.
But as we ended our prayer time, we
were also convinced of one other thing.
We were not going to desert our wounded
brother.
We did not exactly know how we were
going to treat his deep and crippling wounds,
but we were sure that we were not
going to leave him on the battlefield to
die.
But the first thing we had to do
was to confront Greg.
Dick and I were already seated as Greg
came through the door.
His usual jovial self, his inquiring eyes flashed
back and forth from Dick to me.
What's up, he asked.
Greg, I said, we've just had some very
disturbing news.
Dick and I had been on the phone
all morning listening to acquaintances of yours describe
you in a way that we've not known
you.
Two men have been telling us that you
have been immoral with their wives.
We have talked to the women.
They've confirmed the story.
A pastor from the same community called and
said that the word is out and the
stories are reaching scandalous proportions.
Is any of this true?
I watched Greg as the color drained from
his face, his eyes lowered and his shoulders
sagged.
I saw telltale beads of perspiration pop out
across his forehead.
He heaved one long, agonizing sigh.
He shook his head and said, yes.
Yes, pastor, it's true.
Ten women in three churches over a period
of 13 years?
Yes.
Were you a staff member in these churches
at the time?
Yes.
Who were these women?
Were they church members?
Yes.
We purposely avoided any request for details.
Greg, has there been any immorality here at
Hinson in the two years you've been here?
No.
His answer was emphatic.
I came here determined that what I had
done would never happen again and it hasn't.
We sat in awkward silence for a long
time.
I really didn't know what to ask him
next.
I felt restrained from any further questioning.
Sometime later, Greg lifted his eyes slowly to
me and said, that's not really true, pastor.
I have done it here and I'm so
ashamed and I'm so sorry.
The last thing in the world that I
ever wanted to do was to hurt you
or to hurt this church.
I'm sorry.
I'll never forget the strange combination of deep
sorrow and intense anger that I felt as
I watched this wonderful man shrink in stature
and bow in shame and weep in humiliation.
Does Joanna know about this, Greg?
No, I'm sure she doesn't.
Does she suspect?
No.
Does the family know?
His eyes were desperate.
Do they need to know?
That's not really the question right now, is
it, Greg?
The question is, who will tell them?
It's really public information and it's impossible for
this sort of thing to be kept quiet.
They will know and probably soon.
I think if possible, Greg, you should be
the one to tell your wife.
All right, he said.
We made arrangements, the two of us, to
get together that evening to tell Joanna.
Do you want my resignation, pastor?
No, I said.
I don't want your resignation.
Not yet, anyway.
I don't know what I want, Greg.
We need some time to think and to
pray and to study and to deliberate before
we really will be able to make any
decision.
As I stood up, both Dick and Greg
stood.
We moved toward each other.
We embraced each other in a desperate hug
and we prayed and we wept.
And I drove Greg home that night.
It was one of the longest trips I
had ever taken.
How does a man tell his loving wife
that he's been unfaithful to her repeatedly over
a period of 13 years?
I was about to learn the answer to
that question.
Joanna was startled to see me at the
door at that hour.
Her apprehension noticeably grew as I told her
that her husband was in my car and
that we needed to talk.
She and Greg climbed into the rear seat
of my car and they sat in stunned
silence.
Suddenly he broke into deep and convulsive sobs.
He took his wife in his arms.
He buried his head in her shoulder and
said, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I've been unfaithful to you.
Unfaithful.
I've been living a lie for 13 years
with a number of women.
I'm so sorry and I'm so ashamed.
Joanna stiffened just momentarily and then without a
word, wrapped both arms tightly around her husband,
drew him close, cradled him like a baby,
and said, I can forgive you.
I love you, Greg.
I love you.
It was hours before I left.
Not much else was said.
Not much else was needed.
As I finally pulled away from that house,
I felt anger again, but this time a
fierce anger directed toward our mortal enemy, Satan,
whose wilds and subtleties had again brought chaos
out of beauty.
But I was relieved.
I was surprised by Joanna's response to Greg's
confession.
It was far more conciliatory than I'd expected.
And if she were able to maintain this
love and forgiveness through the dark days that
lay ahead, maybe there was hope.
Just a glimmer.
A glimmer of hope that through it all,
God might receive glory and one of his
servants might be restored to a place of
effective ministry once again.
It did not seem possible, but maybe, just
maybe, Greg could serve again.
Some form of disciplinary action had to be
taken.
Greg's long-term sin was an offense to
God, to the church, to his family, and
to himself.
It was public knowledge.
It was a major scandal in at least
one of his former churches.
John Calvin more than 300 years ago reminded
us, if no society, indeed no house, which
has even a small family, can be kept
in proper condition without discipline, it is much
more necessary in the church whose condition should
be as ordered as possible.
The discipline was necessary was really not the
question.
The form, the direction, the course of action,
the short-term and long-range objectives, these
were the questions that were before us.
For nearly eight years, we had been attempting
to build an Ephesians 4 type of ministry
at Henson.
We sought a ministry built upon lives patterned
after our Lord.
We sought that visible oneness that makes the
body of Christ attractive and irresistible to a
world of separated and lonely people.
And Greg had a tremendous following in the
church.
He was popular, he was effective, he was
well-liked.
For two years, I had honored him in
private as well as in public.
I had carefully and purposefully worked to see
Greg accepted and even successful in his staff
role.
And the sort of love relationship that this
man had established with the people was one
that could not be easily forsaken.
People just do not fall in and out
of love easily.
Discipline does have the potential of being terribly
divisive.
Whatever decision we made had to be right.
It had to be biblical, not just for
Greg's sake, but for ours and for the
sake of the whole church.
In Greg's case, we were dealing with a
persistent sin that had obviously not been forsaken,
nor had there been any true repentance.
Is it possible to help Greg find his
way out of this sin without resorting to
any public disclosure?
One of them asked.
To me, this has always been the ideal
method of corrective church discipline, discipline behind closed
doors, I call it.
That's the sort of discipline Jesus used when
he rebuked or corrected his disciples, a discipline
done in private, away from the crowds, away
from the trauma of embarrassment.
Oftentimes, I hear the complaint that the church
is not practicing church discipline anymore.
That's not true.
We who are pastors, elders, deacons, church members
are constantly rebuking, exhorting, encouraging, and warning our
people, but most of it is done in
private.
Adjustments in living habits are being made quietly
without attracting public attention.
This, to me, is the ideal method of
church discipline.
Jesus' loving restoration of Peter after his cowardly
denial was hidden from prying eyes and from
listening ears.
It was just between Jesus and Peter.
Within the last few years, one young Christian
brother in our body was seen engaging in
offensive, unchristian behavior.
When this was reported to me, another staff
person and I took him aside and lovingly
confronted him.
I told him what I'd heard, and then
I asked him if it were true.
He answered me that the charges were true.
I then put my arm around his shoulder
and asked, how can we be of help
to you?
With that, his defenses sagged and he began
to weep.
He accepted our offer to help, and his
life was changed.
Now, this was an act of corrective discipline,
but it was done in private, and it
was designed to correct improper behavior, and it
was effective.
In 1 Corinthians 5, verse 11, the Apostle
Paul lists six sins deserving of corrective discipline,
sins which, if practiced, actually deserve the combined
public action that causes the sinner to be
excluded from the Church.
He said, actually, I wrote to you not
to associate with any so-called brother if
he should be an immoral person, or covetous,
or an idolater, or a reviler, or a
drunkard, or a swindler, not even to eat
with such in one.
The sins listed here are certainly out of
character for a Christian, and they need to
be brought into judgment.
That judgment can be personal, and it can
be private, but when we refuse to judge
our sins, as is the case of the
arrogant sinner described in 1 Corinthians chapter 5,
verses 1 and 2, then public action is
required.
We're constantly taking private corrective action to deal
with those who carry bad habits from the
old life into the new, or when an
experienced believer falls into one of Satan's snares.
I prefer this method to all others, and
I would like to have been able to
deal quietly with Greg's sin in such a
fashion, but Greg's sin was public.
It was against the whole body.
It was scandalous and destructive.
Everyone knew about it, and it required some
sort of open and public rebuke.
Slowly, painfully, reluctantly, we all began to realize
that we were on the brink of an
extremely difficult public experience.
We had no alternative but to protect the
church and to correct a brother, but there
was a need to be fully aware of
our biblical authority for whatever action we took,
and we still had to determine that precise
direction that we would follow.
As a shaken and grieving church staff, we
felt thrown back upon the Word of God.
We really needed a collective refresher course in
the biblical teachings on church discipline, and we
needed it immediately.
The first thing we reminded ourselves is that
discipline in the church is not optional, but
it's mandatory.
It's an absolute necessity if we're going to
be obedient to the scriptures.
Matthew 18, 15 to 20 teaches that a
sinning brother is to be confronted, reproved, and
excluded from the church if he refuses to
repent.
Acts 5, 1 to 11 illustrates the seriousness
of sin within the church, the sensitivity of
the Holy Spirit to sin, and the quick
judgment of God upon sin.
First Corinthians 5, 1 to 5 teaches that
in the event of persistent unrepentant sin, the
church is to grieve, deliberate, judge, and exclude
the unrepentant member.
First Thessalonians 5, 14 commands us to warn
the disobedient and the disorderly.
Second Thessalonians 3, 6 to 15 teaches us
to warn the undisciplined brother and to withdraw
from him.
First Timothy 5, 20 tells us to rebuke
persistent sin publicly.
Titus 1, 13 says to severely reprove those
who teach untruth.
Titus 3, 10 commands us to withdraw from
one who causes divisions but only after adequate
warning.
Revelation 2 and 3, two chapters, call the
churches to repentance and warn of impending discipline
if they refuse.
In these passages, God makes it clear that
he intends the church to take corrective measures
in the event its members persist in the
practice of sin.
Whatever reluctance we as a staff felt regarding
our responsibility to Greg, to Henson, or to
ourselves was cast aside in the light of
these biblical admonitions.
We learn that discipline in the church has
many purposes.
The first of which, of course, is to
honor Christ.
The practice of discipline is simply an act
of obedience and that honors Christ.
Discipline is to restore sinners.
Matthew 18, 15 states that the first consideration
in discipline is that of winning or restoring
the offending brother.
First Corinthians 5, 5 teaches that even exclusion
from the body and deliverance over to Satan
is designed to preserve the spirit.
Second Corinthians 2, 8 commands restoration to the
repentant sinner.
Galatians 6, 1 urges the whole church to
be actively engaged in the process of restoring
a sinning believer.
Any form of discipline, whether it be a
simple warning or the ultimate act of exclusion
from membership, should always be understood as a
part of the total process of restoration.
The goal of discipline is not exclusion but
restoration.
Discipline is practiced to maintain purity.
First Corinthians 5, verses 6 to 8 states
that sin adversely affects the entire church.
Sin's presence permeates the whole body.
Purity is indispensable to power.
The account of Achan's sin and the subsequent
defeat of Joshua's army at Ai, you remember,
teaches the weakening influence of sin whenever its
presence is allowed.
But discipline is also for the purpose of
discouraging others from sinning.
First Timothy 5, 20 calls for a public
rebuke of the elder who refuses to repent
in order that others may fear the consequences
of sin.
We notice that discipline in the church is
to be undertaken in a spirit of love
and fear.
Galatians 6, 1 makes it clear as it
exhorts us to be gentle and aware of
our own humanness whenever we attempt to correct
a sinning brother.
Second Thessalonians 3, 15 warns us to keep
in mind the relationship we have with the
offender.
He's not our enemy.
He's our brother.
Matthew 18, 15 to 20 tells us how
to perform the act of discipline.
The passage is the first and most complete
instruction in New Testament scripture on the subject
of discipline.
It's profound for its brevity and its thoroughness.
Let me read it for you.
It says, And if your brother sins, go
and reprove him in private.
If he listens to you, you have won
your brother.
But if he does not listen to you,
take one or more, one or two more
with you, so that by the mouth of
two or three witnesses every fact may be
confirmed.
And if he refuses to listen to them,
tell it to the church.
And if he refuses to listen even to
the church, tell him, let him be to
you as a Gentile and a tax gatherer.
Truly I say to you, whatever you shall
bind on earth shall be bound in heaven.
Whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed
in heaven.
Again I say to you, that if two
of you agree on earth about anything that
they may ask, it shall be done for
them by my Father who is in heaven.
For where two or three have gathered together
in my name, there I am in the
midst.
You notice what this passage assumes.
First of all, it assumes relationship.
It begins with the words, If your brother.
Church discipline is a family affair.
First Corinthians 5, 10, and 11 makes it
clear that discipline is confined to those in
Christ and does not reach out beyond the
boundaries of the church to the world.
It's a family affair.
Now we have an established relationship with Greg.
Therefore we had a biblical responsibility.
Greg was not only a brother, not only
a fellow member, but he was a fellow
servant.
There was no question regarding relationship.
He was a member of the family.
The same passage implies imperfection.
It says, If your brother sins.
Now sin is both a reality and a
possibility in the believer's life.
We all wish it were not, but it
is.
Our brother had broken the moral law of
God, had jeopardized his marital relationship, had offended
the Holy Spirit of God.
He'd compromised the whole body of Christ.
Greg had sinned repeatedly, and the impact of
that sin had been felt in every public
service since his arrival.
The passage goes further.
The passage commands confrontation.
Listen to it again.
If your brother sinned, go.
Now it's right here that most corrective relationships
often break down.
Confrontation to many is extremely difficult.
To speak the truth in love to an
offending brother requires more than just an insensitive
accusation, more than just a perfunctory rebuke, more
than an unsubstantiated assumption.
Confrontation, or the act of addressing the problem
of sin in a brother's life, must be
pre-prayed, pre-thought, and pre-planned.
It must not be done impulsively or in
anger.
Since it's the first crucial and cautious step
toward the restoration of a Christian brother, since
the instinctive human response to any suggestion of
sin is denial, the first step in confrontation
is critical.
The passage in Matthew also commands reproof.
If your brother sins, go and reprove him.
To expose and convince one of his sin
is the meaning here of the word reprove.
Reproof is the gentle, loving word of warning
that tells the offender that someone knows about
the sin in his life and someone cares.
The passage also demands privacy.
If your brother sins, go and reprove him.
And notice it says in private.
Christians oftentimes act scandalously here, whether it's pride
or lack of self-restraint.
Oftentimes we tell everyone but the sinner himself.
Sin scandalizes all of heaven.
The fewer earth people who know about it,
the better.
Notice again the passage seeks restoration.
If your brother sins, go and reprove him
in private.
If he listens to you, you have won
your brother.
The goal of any kind of confrontive discipline
is restoration.
There is a potential for great joy when
a Christian obeys the command of Jesus Christ.
And to love the individual back into a
vital, satisfying relationship with his Lord is the
goal of all corrective and all confrontive discipline.
You see, if he listens to you, you
have won your brother.
And that, to me, is the goal of
discipline.
There are alternatives.
But the ultimate and initial goal of discipline
is restoration.
As we continued studying Matthew chapter 18, verses
15 to 18, we realized that Jesus was
very explicit in teaching us how to discipline
a member of the body who had fallen
into sin.
We realized, first of all, that the passage
taught us that the primary goal was restoration.
That if our brother sins, we're to go
to him to reprove him, and if he
listens to us, we have won him.
That's restoration.
We also noticed that the passage teaches alternatives.
But if he does not listen, there's always
the possibility of rejection, rationalization, attempts at justification,
even outright denial.
When any or all of these take place,
then it's time to expand the sphere of
information.
The Bible says two or more witnesses are
always required in Scripture before any accusation can
be honored.
One witness is never enough.
Every time I talked with Greg, Dick was
with me, not only for the sake of
the biblical command for multiple witnesses, but also
because my recall is not really as dependable
as Dick's.
We would often ask permission to take brief
notes or conversations.
We never recorded anything on tape.
Two or three witnesses are not only needed
to confirm the rejection of a reproof, but
they're often needed to confirm the validity of
an accusation.
If the brother has sinned, and if he
persists in his sin, if he refuses to
repent and seek forgiveness, then the added witness
can confirm this to the larger body.
They can also confirm that appropriate steps were
taken and multiple warnings were given before the
more drastic measures are taken.
Verse 16 states that every fact or every
word needs confirmation.
That's so important.
Every fact, every word needs confirmation.
You notice Matthew 15, or Matthew 18, verses
15 to 18, expands the alternatives.
It says, if he even refuses to listen
to them, then tell it to the church.
To the believer, the church is always the
supreme court here on earth, the final court
of appeals.
The church has access to greater wisdom than
any human institution, and the church always has
a member of the Godhead present.
The church, with its combined spiritual gifts, its
limitless wisdom, its God, is capable of bringing
combined pressure to bear on Satan that can
limit his power on a believer's life.
It's so important that the church be ultimately
brought into the discussion, if necessary, so that
the power of the church can be brought
to bear on the enemy himself.
Notice the passage suggests the ultimate alternative.
If he refuses to listen to the church,
let him be as a Gentile and a
tax gatherer.
Now, the painfully decisive step to exclude a
brother or a sister from the fellowship of
the church is sometimes a necessity.
He is then to be regarded as an
outsider.
Gentiles were regarded as heathen.
The Jew had no fellowship with them.
The tax gatherer was considered to be a
person of low character who was obstinate, self
-willed, totally unlike a child of God.
In other words, the sinning Christian is disowned
as a brother and he's treated as a
non-believer.
This means he's excluded from the ministry, from
the service, and from fellowship at the Lord's
table.
It does not mean that he cannot attend
the services of the church.
Even non-believers are granted this privilege.
It's always well to remember how the church
is instructed to treat the heathen.
You see, we send missionaries to them.
At the same time, the persistent sinner is
put back into the world, which is the
domain of Satan.
The brother has chosen to serve Satan and
is now relinquished from the protective grace of
God so that Satan can do with him
as he wishes.
The final decision is made by a vote
of the church or a representative body of
the church, and that decision is binding.
It's important that that action not be reversed
until sufficient time has elapsed to confirm the
genuineness of repentance.
But even as we reviewed all of these
instructive passages, some questions still remained.
How are we to apply these passages to
the specific case at hand?
When should a person be disciplined?
Who is the proper subject for discipline?
What discipline needed to be imposed?
We still needed to know exactly what to
do with Greg.
Corrective church discipline is designed for sins of
such a nature that they obscure the truth
of God, they bring into question the character
of God, or they obstruct the purposes of
God.
Anything that endangers the purity, the harmony, or
the efficiency of the church appears to be
worthy of corrective discipline.
And we notice as we study Scripture that
the subjects of discipline are clearly outlined in
Scripture.
All spiritual leaders are to subject themselves to
different forms of discipline.
And spiritual leaders are not to be subject
to any greater discipline than non-leaders.
And yet here in Greg's case, since he
was a member of the pastoral staff, could
we say that he was above discipline?
Is there ever a time when spiritual leaders
are free to engage in acts of sin
without the fear of discipline?
Is there a difference between discipline and punishment?
Any church discipline is grounded in the fact
that God himself disciplines his children.
All of God's children can expect discipline.
For those whom the Lord loves, he disciplines.
And he scourges every son whom he received,
we're told in Hebrews chapter 12.
God disciplines directly, he disciplines indirectly.
God's direct discipline is often described as punishment.
The word scourge is used in Hebrews.
The word implies that some form of pain
is imposed upon the disobedient.
That pain can be physical, psychological, even material.
But it's painful.
Now, we couldn't punish Greg.
That's God's providence.
But what were we to do?
Since Greg was a leader in the church,
we studied the biblical requirements for church leaders,
the methods of discipline recommended when a leader
sins, and then we determined our course of
action.
Since Greg had disqualified himself for spiritual leadership,
he needed to be removed from ministry.
He needed to surrender his ordination.
He needed to be relieved of responsibility.
And yet, we did not feel we could
exclude him from the church, since he had
accepted our reproof.
In fact, we would strongly recommend that he
remain in the church until such time as
his restoration was complete.
Since both he and Joanna needed help in
understanding and overcoming this problem, and since he
needed the strong spiritual support of men to
whom he could become accountable, we recommended that
he stay in the church, that he receive
professional counseling, that he surrender his ordination, that
he become a part of a supportive fellowship
made up of men who would regularly exhort
and encourage him.
And since he was a spiritual leader, and
his influence was of such marked significance, we
would require that he acknowledge his sin publicly
to the entire congregation on the following Sunday
evening.
1 Timothy 5.20 says, Those who continue
in sin rebuke in the presence of all,
so that the rest also may be fearful
of me.
That following Sunday evening, when Greg confessed his
sin to the church, it seemed that the
whole city had turned out.
I had announced in both services that morning
that, in addition to our study in Hebrews
chapter 6 that evening, we were going to
be dealing with a matter of utmost urgency
to the entire church family.
I encouraged them to come, and they came.
And then, following the service, I asked if
there were any who wished to leave, to
feel free to do so.
No one moved.
Finally, I walked up to the pulpit.
I called the chairman of the board and
some members of the staff to the platform
with me, and after a brief prayer, I
called Greg from his place in the auditorium
to join me behind the pulpit.
I watched him as he reluctantly let go
of Joanna's hand and moved slowly, apprehensively up
the steps of the platform.
I saw his wife's bowed head, and I
became very much aware of an awesome expectant
stillness that hovered over a disbelieving crowd.
As he approached me, I walked toward him,
I held out my arms, and I hugged
him tightly.
We both wept.
I could feel the tension in his body,
and I could hear the sobs that stirred
somewhere deep within him.
Then I turned to the congregation, and I
said, There have been things brought to our
attention this week that tell us that one
of our members, one of our soldiers, has
fallen in battle.
One of our warriors is down.
He needs tonight to have an opportunity to
bear his heart to the family.
He needs also to feel the love and
forgiveness of his church.
We, the staff and the board, with his
and Joanna's consent, have asked him to share
what's in his life.
With that brief introduction, Greg stepped up and
began to speak.
His voice was weak and hoarse from crying,
his shoulders sagged, and he said simply, I
stand before you as an example of what
pastor was preaching about tonight.
I stand here to ask your forgiveness for
inexcusable behavior.
I have resigned.
I'm surrendering my ordination because I've been unfaithful
to my wife here and in two prior
churches, not just once, but many times, and
with many different women.
When I came to Hinson, I felt that
I had left this sin behind me, but
I hadn't.
Would to God I could start all over
again.
But as pastor said, You can't.
Something has been lost.
I've lost something.
I have hurt innocent people, he said.
I've hurt you.
I've hurt pastor.
Because I came here under false pretenses, I
frankly duped all of you into believing that
I was something that I was not.
I beg your forgiveness.
I plead for it.
And I do pray that if any of
you are considering some similar course of action,
that you'll see what it's costing and turn
away from it and allow God to cleanse
you.
My wife has forgiven me.
My family has forgiven me.
I hope you will forgive me.
The congregation was silent, intently interested, but totally
silent.
No one moved, no one spoke, no one
even coughed.
Some heads were bowed, many eyes were moist,
but no one seemed to quite know what
to do next.
I asked Greg to be seated with Joanna,
and then I said I want to speak
to the family for just a few minutes
from the scriptures.
And I told Greg Thursday that no matter
what happened, I loved him.
I would continue to love him.
I told him too that as surprising as
it may seem, I have a hunch this
church family is going to continue to love
him too.
What we have done tonight, I said, I
hope only has to be done once for
all time.
Some of you possibly are wondering why are
we doing it so publicly?
Shouldn't this be done privately?
Why is it necessary to expose this dear
brother to such public embarrassment?
And I told them about 1 Timothy chapter
5, verses 17 to 22, how it talks
about church leaders, how they should be honored,
how they should be rebuked.
It says, do not receive an accusation against
an elder except on the basis of two
or three witnesses, but then goes on to
say that even if a public servant persists
in sin, rebuke him publicly that all may
fear.
And then I told them the steps we
had taken.
I said this is the route we're going.
One, we've asked Greg to acknowledge his sin
to his wife and family, that he did.
Two, that he confess his sin to the
church family, that he has just done.
Three, that he surrender his ordination until such
a time that we feel he might be
again qualified for ministry, that he has done.
Four, that he not engage in any public
ministry without our permission, to that he has
agreed.
Five, that he submit to extensive psychological counseling.
We recommended a psychologist within the church family
and offered to pay counseling fees if necessary.
He agreed to that also.
Six, and this was the hardest, that he
and his family remain right here in Hinson
and allow us the privilege of helping in
his restoration.
We have asked the family to remain in
their places of present ministry.
They can't believe that we would accept them
after what's happened, but I'm convinced that the
church is a redemptive society, not only for
those on the outside, but those on the
inside as well.
We've encouraged Greg to seek secular employment, and
that he will do.
And we've asked him to take as long
as necessary to experience restoration.
How long will that take?
I don't know.
A sufficient length of time to prove to
himself, to his family, his church family, and
to his God that he is truly spiritually
mature enough to carry on a ministry where
he can honor Christ.
So we've asked him to stay right here
and be restored.
And then I looked at my congregation and
I asked, Do you agree?
I was really not prepared for the response
that followed.
The entire congregation stood to its feet and
applauded, a long, sustained, overwhelming applause that caused
both me and Greg and Joanna and most
everyone else in the building to collapse in
tears.
Before leaving and after prayer, I said, I
want to ask one more thing of the
church.
It's all been said.
There's no need to say more.
All the questions have been answered.
There's no reason to ask any more.
Nothing stops the rumor mill faster than when
it's all been said.
Now let's talk to God.
Let's reclaim our brother and complete the total
restoration and then go home.
The most difficult and yet the most crucial
decision that we had made was to request
that Greg and Joanna remain right at Hinson
Church.
We didn't realize at the time what a
big part this was to play in the
restoration process.
The threat of discipline usually results in departure.
Most disciplined church members leave their church or
are asked to leave.
When that happens, however, the problem is rarely
corrected.
It's simply transplanted.
Exclusion or withdrawal does not mean or necessarily
imply departure.
The rights and privileges that are withdrawn are
meant to cause sorrow and shame to the
point of repentance and such repentance is meant
to lead to requests for forgiveness and restoration
to the excluding body.
The large number of churches available today to
the average Christian make discipline and restoration almost
impossible.
It becomes a fairly simple matter for a
sinning member to quickly lose himself in another
congregation and then soon forget or cover over
the real reason that forced him to change
churches.
When spiritual leaders fall in sin, the first
concern is to remove them quickly and as
far away as possible.
But this accomplishes nothing.
The sinner is uncorrected.
The church is denied the opportunity to learn
its vital lessons about sin and it's also
denied an opportunity for forgiveness and restoration.
You see, discipline demands accountability and effective accountability
is impossible among strangers.
One of the many mistakes I made during
Greg's 26-month restoration period was that I
failed to maintain constant contact with him.
Later I would come to realize that Greg
was really a cast sheep and as a
cast sheep he needed all the support and
strength that the staff could give him and
I along with others did not give him
as much as he needed.
Greg was down, he was dying, he was
unable to get up by himself, but the
level of concern that he required was not
always present.
A group of five men invited Greg to
join them for a weekly breakfast.
This quickly became the supportive fellowship that met
most of Greg's needs.
They accepted him completely.
They treated him as a human being and
as an equal.
There was no condemnation, no criticism, no conditions
were imposed.
They studied together.
They read books like The Fight and How
to Say No to a Stubborn Habit and
Knowing God and The Pursuit of Holiness and
others and each week they'd read a prescribed
chapter and discuss it together.
Greg has repeated time and again that this
was one of his major areas of support.
We prayed for him but we seldom prayed
for him publicly which is something we should
have done.
One friend suggested that Greg and Joanna develop
a promise book.
She told them to write down every meaningful
promise they encountered as they read the scriptures.
Then in their low times they wouldn't be
forced to search their Bibles for help but
they'd already have quick access to some meaningful
verse.
What helpful counsel that proved to be.
At times Greg would come home after a
terribly frustrating day at work too defeated to
continue.
He'd pick up the promise book and he
said he would gain immediate strength.
They would also record specific prayer requests along
with the answers to prayer.
This God would often use to bolster their
faith when they were tempted to feel that
he deserted them.
Some of Joanna's Sunday school class took her
to an occasional lunch.
Many of them wrote to her with words
of encouragement.
When we recommended a period of discipline for
the purpose of restoration we failed to place
any time limits.
In fact we were reluctant to even suggest
that complete restoration to gospel ministry was even
a remote possibility.
And Greg yet did need some hope.
The possibility that he might never be allowed
to return was devastating to him.
We should have been more responsive to his
need for hope.
None of us felt truly comfortable with Greg
and Joanna.
They didn't feel comfortable with us.
None of us really knew what to talk
about in their presence.
Only a few of us ever addressed the
great heartache that persisted to cause deep and
unbearable pain.
But Greg and Joanna suffered the most.
Greg developed a severe case of colitis and
every time he'd get up to prepare to
come to church he'd get sick.
As they approached the building the apprehension grew.
They felt overwhelmed by their shame and their
dread.
Some would greet them warmly, some would greet
them coldly, others would simply turn away.
In his terribly sensitive state Greg felt rejection
from almost everyone.
It wasn't too long before he developed a
hunger for the Bible that caused him to
hang on every word.
He couldn't get enough.
We were studying the book of Hebrews and
he claimed that it was tremendously helpful to
him.
He also listened to cassette tapes and sermons.
The radio ministry of Chuck Swindoll and others
were a great source of help.
But still the deep emotional responses to exposure
and humiliation prevailed and they kept all of
us uncomfortable for months.
This was a heavy price to pay for
the restoration of one brother.
But it was worth it.
I never will forget the Sunday six months
after the humiliation when Greg sat in a
new Sunday morning seat halfway down toward the
front, head erect, eyes glowing with a look
of expectancy on his face.
At some point in the sermon I said
something that touched him.
I saw his head bob up and down
and I heard a hearty amen and I
thought to myself, Greg's back.
I think one of the most crucial things
that happened during the whole experience was Joanna's
response to Greg on that fateful Thursday when
his whole world came crashing down.
During the hours and days that followed Joanna's
emotional anesthetic wore off and she experienced great
anger and bitterness and self-pity and various
incidents would come to mind that had always
been remembered as wonderful and happy times with
many of her close friends and as she
recalled them carefully she would realize that those
happy occasions had often been used by her
husband and her friends as opportunities for infidelity.
As her struggles increased so did Greg's.
He was constantly depressed.
Joanna found herself torn between trying to fight
the immense battle going on within her and
at the same time to encourage her husband
in his struggles.
She never seriously considered leaving him.
She realized quickly that the only real biblical
option that she had was to forgive him.
From childhood she'd been taught forgiveness and forgiveness
was her option and she genuinely and totally
forgave him.
Joanna had the same problem most of us
in the church had.
Forgiveness really didn't guarantee her ability to forget.
Our memories were all too sharply tuned in
to the recollections of that horrible confession.
Counseling was a necessity.
Joanna carried deep feelings of guilt because her
seeming forgiveness did not eliminate periodic bouts with
anger and temporary desires to withdraw even to
recoil from her husband.
As I look back on all the crucial
steps taken that ultimately resulted in Greg's restoration
two facts stand out.
The fact that Greg and Joanna were urged
to remain at Henson to experience the love
and forgiveness of the body and the fact
of Joanna's willingness to forgive her husband.
Without her strong determination to obey God there
would have been no restoration.
Of this I'm convinced.
Those two things, one to stay in the
body and to be restored in and by
the body and then the wife's total forgiveness
of her husband.
Not only did the church and Joanna play
important roles in Greg's restoration, Greg himself played
a significant part in his own recovery.
He willingly made himself subject to his church
and its leadership.
I've always been acutely aware of the presence
of Hebrews 13 17 in scripture which says
obey your leaders and submit to them for
they keep watch over your souls as those
who would give an account.
Let them do this with joy not with
grief for this would be unprofitable for you.
It seems that there are a few scriptures
people heed less than this one.
Accountability is rare.
So is submission to authority.
Those of us who lead find it extremely
difficult to require it, request it, or demand
it.
And yet Jesus began his relationship with his
disciples with two words.
These were a command, a command to be
obeyed, a command that placed each of those
12 men in a submissive dependent accountable role.
The words follow me.
Now they meant nothing more, nothing less than
just do what you're told.
Now any organization that plans any degree of
success in fulfilling its role in this world
must have both leaders and followers.
Leaders must lead and followers must follow.
Any leader who plans to lead must give
commands and that's the response of those of
us and the responsibility of those of us
in leadership.
When we entered into a relationship with Greg,
we asked him if he was willing to
be completely submissive to the church in general
and to the staff and the board in
particular.
We asked him if on certain occasions he
would submit to me.
This placed me in the position of that
leader described in Hebrews 13, 17.
To this Greg agreed.
He never accepted any invitation to minister in
any form or to any degree without first
consulting with me.
Nearly every week there was a request and
nearly every week during that first year I
was forced to say no.
Greg, you need time to feel the enormity
of your sin, you need time to feel
the reality of forgiveness, you need time to
recover your own self-confidence.
Yet saying no to him when I knew
he was slowly dying on the inside for
some opportunity to minister was one of the
most difficult things I've ever done.
I guess I'm really an old softy who
finds it difficult to deprive anyone of anything
and to deprive Greg was terribly hard.
He would come to me, describe an invitation,
make his appeal and I would say no,
not yet Greg.
I would then hear his beautifully obedient, all
right, whatever you say and watch the expectancy
in his face drain away into disappointment.
He'd never argue but it was obvious that
he wished I would throw just one yes
in his direction.
I would then take that request, I'd tuck
it away in my consciousness and mull it
over and over again.
Did I make the right decision?
Am I causing Greg too much sorrow?
How do we know when he's had enough?
It was often necessary for me to run
these requests by the staff and board, to
gain their perspective and to make sure that
I was doing right.
I got to the place where I almost
shunned him.
There were times I didn't want to talk
to him.
I would delay returning his phone calls or
requests from others simply because I wanted to
be spared having to speak that inevitable no.
I wanted to avoid that carefully masked disappointment
but Greg obeyed always.
He submitted himself to us completely.
He didn't always appreciate our decisions but he
obeyed them.
He obeyed when we told him that we
felt he should remain at Hinson until he
was restored.
This was the most difficult command that was
placed upon him but he stayed.
Gradually, one by one, we began lifting restrictions.
He was allowed at first to minister in
Sunday school classes and at social gatherings then
to larger groups.
Eventually he was permitted to teach one of
the largest Sunday school classes in the church.
The first time he was allowed back on
the platform to minister in the church auditorium
he played Oh Love That Will Not Let
Me Go and then I Am Loved, I
Am Loved, I Can Risk Loving You For
The One Who Knows Me Best Loves Me
Most.
The restoration of the sinner was due in
part to the obedience of the sinner.
Without Greg's submission restoration would have been impossible
and yet during all this time Greg suffered
deeply for his sin.
For 13 years he'd been looking over his
shoulder expecting discovery at any time.
13 years of emotional chaos, of spiritual deadness,
13 years of of abject fear.
One would think that this in itself would
be sufficient suffering for sin.
There was the feeling of guilt and under
such feelings some die.
Others wish they could die.
David oft times spoke of guilt in Psalm
32 as being a near-death experience and
in Greg's life there was physical suffering.
There was emotional suffering.
There was material suffering.
In fact, Greg and his family lost almost
everything they had ever owned.
A large equity in a home, not only
the respect of so many but almost all
material possessions were gone.
He felt heavily the chastisement of God in
his life.
Not punishment, not judgment, but chastisement.
And as we read very carefully in Hebrews
chapter 12 chastisement is a very real part
of the corrective procedure for sin.
Chastisement can be both corrective and it can
be preventative.
Job's chastisement, you remember, was for the purpose
of revealing Jehovah, God, to the world.
Abraham was chastised.
Paul was chastised.
David was chastised.
Chastening is designed for perfecting and Greg's whole
process of restoration was a chastising experience that
was perfecting him.
Greg's chastening began with the whispered warnings that
pled with him before he fell and they
continued to grow in intensity as he persisted.
Chastening came in full force with his exposure.
It continued through his humiliation and still in
effect today as he battles with a tortured
memory and a smeared reputation.
After he was removed from the church he
prayed for a job.
He asked for an income and he got
a job but he said later that his
first month on the job brought him the
sum total of 38 dollars in earnings.
Some fellow church members brought him into their
insurance agency but he hated the insurance business.
He faced each day with dread and he
entered it only by sheer determination.
He forced himself to make appointments and to
call on prospects.
The first month was a good one, even
a promising one.
He surprised himself and his associates but after
that it was all downhill until he finally
quit 25 months later when his average income
was only $100 a week.
Greg and Joanna struggled vainly to keep their
home, maintain their payments, but they couldn't.
They lost their house, they lost more than
$30,000 in equity.
When Greg's restoration was complete and they finally
left Hinson they had less than $700 of
their own money and $850 given them as
a love offering from the members of their
Sunday school class.
Greg looked constantly for other jobs but each
time it seemed to him that God had
closed the door.
Greg continually asked permission to accept places of
ministry but to these he was refused.
There were times when he became angry but
then eventually he submitted and Greg however was
convinced that through it all this was not
judgment, this was chastening and chastening is the
normal experience of a child of God.
One of the happy truths of chastening that
sustained Greg through the whole experience was simply
that that says, whom the Lord loveth he
chastened and he grabbed hold of Hebrews 12
11 and he held on tightly for the
promise there was that all discipline for the
moment seems not to be joyful but sorrowful
yet to those who've been trained by it
afterwards it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness.
Afterwards, after it's all over it yields righteousness
and peace and that was the hope to
which he clung.
Greg's reordination was really a celebration.
It came just 55 weeks following the advent
of his discipline.
We had not acknowledged any specific plan to
take steps toward restoration at the end of
the year but we had determined to thoroughly
review the discipline process and at least consider
some positive recommendations and the first encouragement came
in the form of a letter from his
counselor, the psychologist within our own body who
suggested that it's time to reconsider allowing Greg
to return to ministry.
He said at the close of his letter,
I would strongly urge you to consider this
brother for full restoration and placement in the
ministry again.
But this encouraging recommendation was in sharp contrast
to the rather pessimistic outlook we'd been given
months before.
The counseling sessions had been very productive.
Greg had been helped to see how he
had been viewing women as objects rather than
persons and he was given insights into the
mechanics of seduction and how these immoral relationships
develop.
In a meeting with Greg and Joanna following
the receipt of the counselor's letter, we listened
carefully to the reports of progress.
It was obvious that the feelings of guilt
had begun to diminish.
The heaviness had been lifted.
The oppressive shame was no longer evident.
As the staff met with Greg and Joanna,
we asked some probing questions.
To Joanna, we asked, what's happening in Greg's
life that seems to assure you that you'll
never be forced to go through this shameful
experience again?
She was radiant.
My husband is a changed man, she said.
He has become the spiritual leader I had
always hoped he would be.
He prays for me and with me.
His prayers are prayers of depth and meaning.
He leads us in family devotions each morning
at the breakfast table.
He's displaying a love for God and an
appreciation for me that I've craved for more
than 28 years.
Since most of the immoral relationships had developed
in counseling sessions, we were quite concerned that
he'd carefully be guarded in this area.
Greg and Joanna had already made some significant
decisions.
Greg would never counsel a woman alone more
than once.
He would then either refer her to another,
or he would enter into a team counseling
relationship.
We asked Greg, how are you going to
keep these memories fresh so that you'll not
fall back into sin?
With that, he showed me a plaque and
a key ring, both bearing the name of
the insurance company for which he worked.
He said, one will hang on my wall
and the other I'll keep in my pocket
to remind me of the most miserable months
of my life, he said.
We recommended that his ordination be restored to
him.
The service was much like any other ordination
service, except that the spirit of that meeting
was vastly different.
I felt deeply grateful to God as I
prayed.
Many of the men gathered in that expanded
circle around Greg wept openly as they placed
their hands on his head.
We were fully aware that something unique and
something wonderful was happening.
As communion was served, the staff took the
elements first to Greg and then to Joanna.
We counted it a high honor to serve
them.
Following the reordination service, Greg wrote to me
and he said, dear pastor, we often wanted
to thank you for the way in which
you've borne the grief and pain my sin
caused you and the Hinson family.
The extra pressures this brought on you and
the staff are part of the ache in
my heart that memory calls forth again and
again.
And then he went on to say, thank
you again for being willing to be used
of God in my discipline and in my
healing.
Any future ministry God may allow us will
be due to your courage and the backing
of the staff and the board and the
Hinson family.
In reordaining Greg, we had commended him to
God for whatever ministry God would feel appropriate.
We had commended him to the ministry, but
not a ministry.
He was still without a job.
Many were disappointed that we had not invited
him to rejoin the Hinson staff.
There were, however, a number of reasons for
this.
We already had a very capable replacement.
There were those in the church that felt
strongly against asking Greg to rejoin.
His counselor, too, had recommended that he start
afresh somewhere else.
As the weeks and the months dragged on,
I became anxious and perplexed.
The longer Greg went without a place to
minister, the greater the pressure on me to
invite him to work at Hinson.
Many people suggested that the restoration would be
incomplete until we did.
I often struggled with that possibility.
For Greg, the hope of returning to ministry
gave way to fear.
As the months passed, he was becoming increasingly
convinced that God was through with him, that
he would never again return to full-time
ministry.
He was failing as an insurance salesman.
They had lost their home.
They were being faced with the question of
how and where to restore their furniture.
Ministry was no longer merely an urgent desire.
It was now survival.
Where can they go?
I watched him day by day by day,
and I listened to him.
He was wondering, what is it that God
is waiting for?
Why doesn't God allow us back in ministry?
Well, again, early one morning, the silence of
my study was interrupted by the persistent ring
of the telephone.
A longtime friend from a distant city was
calling.
I'm sorry, Don, to interrupt your morning, but
I'm interested in one of your people.
We desperately need a staff man here, and
it seems that from what I've heard, your
man Greg meets the qualifications for the job.
I listened as he described the church and
their needs, and then I asked the question
that had to be asked, the last question
in the world that I wanted to ask.
Do you know that Greg has been under
discipline here at Hinson for the past twenty
-six months?
Yes, he answered.
Do you know why?
I'm not sure I know the whole story,
but I understand there was some moral problem
in the past.
I then proceeded to tell him the entire
story, all that I knew in confidence.
I've always been a firm believer in the
necessity for correct information to be passed from
church to church regarding prospective staff people.
When I finished, there was a long pause,
and then the question for which I had
waited so long.
Do you think he is ready to go
back to work?
Absolutely, I answered.
He has undergone his discipline admirably.
He has completed nine months of psychological counseling.
He has proven his repentance.
He has completely forsaken his sin.
He has assumed the spiritual leadership of his
home and family.
His and Joanna's relationship is stronger than it's
ever been.
He's displaying himself as a man of God.
In fact, I think Greg is probably better
equipped to serve Christ today than most of
us who've never been through the terribly painful
process of discipline and restoration.
Well, it wasn't long before Greg received his
call back to the ministry, and he accepted
it with great enthusiasm.
The church was smaller than any it had
ever served.
The salary was barely adequate, but those things
were incidental to the fact that Greg was
being offered a second chance, and he could
hardly wait to accept it.
The night of their farewell came 26 months
and two weeks from the night of their
humiliation.
The church family crowded back into the same
auditorium to face the same two people, this
time not with shame, but with great joy.
I invited Greg and Joanna to the platform
and said, I think everybody knows without having
to review past experiences what's been happening with
Greg and Joanna.
For 26 months we've undergone a very painful
discipline experience with Greg.
When Greg fell in battle, we regarded him
as a wounded soldier.
We rushed to his aid.
We attempted to help him up.
He responded beautifully.
He let us help him.
We loved him, and we watched him as
he responded to the grace of God and
the love of the church family in a
way that I've never seen demonstrated before.
For two years and two months we have
watched the Spirit of God at work, in
him and through him, and in us and
through us, restoring a man to active ministry.
We asked ourselves when it all began, is
it possible?
We asked Greg, are you willing to stay
right here in the body and let us
love you back into the ministry?
The hardest and most crucial decision that Greg
and Joanna made was that one, yes, he
answered, I will.
And I watched Greg week after week as
he came into this building.
It was painful for him to walk among
his friends.
We were all fully aware of the pain
that was in his heart, but it was
here in his obedience and in our presence
that his healing took place.
Greg and Joanna are different people.
They were great people when they came.
Today they're among the greatest.
I want to thank them publicly for the
way they have submitted themselves to God and
to the church.
And I looked at my church family and
I said, I don't know that I've ever
experienced such willing submission and such painful as
I have seen in them.
I remember that night I then drew them
to me, arms around them both, and said,
Greg and Joanna, I want to thank you
for the way you've allowed God to work
in your lives.
I want to thank you for being responsive
to the Holy Spirit.
God has possibly made you better qualified to
minister today than anybody I know.
That was what I told the pastor of
the church.
That was what I told the pastor of
the church that called you.
And I really believe it.
I turned to Greg and said, is there
anything you'd like to say to this church
family?
Greg's appearance and his demeanor in the pulpit
was vastly different from the night he acknowledged
his sin.
He stood erect, his shoulders thrown back, his
head raised, eyes scanning every upturned face.
And he said, what pastor and staff and
what the board did, said Greg, took guts.
I don't know of any church that has
behaved in this manner toward one who has
fallen.
At least, I've never heard of it being
done.
It took courage to be the first, and
I think God has honored that.
He has certainly honored in our lives, because
we're not the same people we were, he
said.
We're quite different, thanked the Lord.
And we know from some of you that
it's had an effect on your lives as
well.
Greg went on to say, you have shared
with us that you've been praying for us,
and for that we're grateful.
Pastor, he said, thank you.
Thank you for having the courage to invite
us to stay, because that's the only reason
we did.
It would have been much easier to walk
out and never see you again, believe me.
And there were others who helped.
There was a man who counseled me for
nine months, Greg said.
And there were five guys that I met
with every Thursday morning for two years.
And there was a Sunday school class that
was very supportive.
And I want to thank you all.
I want to thank my family, he said.
Because therein lies the real nitty-gritty of
this whole experience.
With that, he drew Joanna to himself, and
he said, if you have ever wanted to
know a godly woman, here's one.
The entire church responded with spontaneous applause to
that.
Our children were behind us 100 percent.
They were supportive the whole time, and God
has just really blessed us as a family.
In fact, all of our relatives supported us
without any reservation, whatever, Greg told the church.
I'll tell you, he said, it's really rich
when you're obedient.
I want to say again to any of
you who are messing around in sin, let
it go.
Give it up.
Ask God's forgiveness.
And come back to the fold, because therein
lies true blessing and joy and peace.
And Greg went on to tell my church,
then above all, I would thank God for
his restorative power to make a new man
of me and allow me again the privilege
of being a minister.
What a glorious God we had.
With that, Greg sat down.
And with those words, we concluded 26 of
the most difficult and yet the most instructive
months in the life of our church family,
26 months of pain and perfecting, months devoted
to salvaging a worthy servant and restoring him
to productive ministry.
As Martha and I went home that night,
the weariness was good.
The need for approval was only slight.
We didn't ask whether or not we'd done
the right thing or said the right thing.
We simply relaxed.
We relaxed with the realization that maybe, just
maybe, we had finally done it right.
We had forgiven a fallen brother, but we
didn't stop there.
Cooperating with God, we moved beyond forgiveness, restoring
a sinning saint to a life of meaning
and a life of ministry.
A ministry that he's performing to this very
day effectively, productively, and in the power of
the Holy Spirit.
Discipline is designed to be restorative, not punitive.
It's designed to lift up the fallen, stand
him on his or her own feet, and
enable them to walk afresh in the Spirit
and experience the fullness of God in their
lives.
Oh we
want to see
us
oh and
say that
we love him