Being the last being, I'm sure we all
want to express our thanks to all of
those who've had such a vital part in
the hard work connected with the conference.
The trouble in giving thanks like this is
that many of the folks are still out
there in the kitchen working, but please convey
our deep gratitude to all who have toiled
so selflessly.
The words come to me, God is not
unrighteous to forget your work and labor of
love, in that ye have ministered to the
saints and do minister.
And I'm sure I speak for all who've
enjoyed this conference and the lovely meals and
the gracious hospitality and all that has gone
in to make it the conference that it
is.
Now interestingly enough, both Brother Bramhall and I
are going to be speaking about tongues this
afternoon, but I'll be speaking about the English
tongue, and he'll be speaking about what the
authorized version calls unknown tongues.
I think tongues is the keynote of this
afternoon's meeting.
We've had the English tongue and the Korean
tongue and the Japanese tongue already.
And what I'd like to speak about is
our conversation, or you might call it building
communication skills.
Some people are excellent conversationalists.
Some of the rest of us aren't.
I'm really speaking to myself this afternoon, but
you can listen.
Oftentimes you can tell when a man speaks
what one of the great needs in his
own life might be.
So shall we turn to Ephesians chapter 4?
I'd just like to read a few verses
and one in particular.
Ephesians chapter 4, beginning with verse 25.
Wherefore, putting away lying, speak every man truth
with his neighbor, for we are members one
of another.
Be ye angry and sin not, let not
the sun go down upon your wrath, neither
give place to the devil.
Let him that stole steal no more, but
rather let him labor, working with his hands
the thing which is good, that he may
have to give to him that needeth.
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your
mouth, but that which is good to the
use of edifying, and the margin of my
Bible says here, to the use of edifying
as the need may be.
Maybe if you have another version of the
Bible it says something like that.
As the need may be, that it may
minister grace unto the hearers.
And grieve not the Holy Spirit of God,
whereby ye are sealed unto the day of
redemption.
That all bitterness and wrath and anger and
clamor and evil speaking be put away from
you with all malice.
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted,
forgiving one another, even as God, it really
should be God in Christ, has forgiven you.
Not so much God for Christ's sake, but
God in Christ.
When you say God for Christ's sake, it
almost sounds as if God is unwilling, but
that the Lord Jesus comes and pleads with
him and therefore he's willing.
But it doesn't mean that.
It means even as God in Christ, in
the work, through the work and person of
the Lord Jesus, has forgiven you.
Now the verse I'm particularly interested in is
verse 29.
As you might have guessed, let no corrupt
communication.
Somewhere I read that that word corrupt could
be translated worthless.
And that's the thought that I have particularly
in mind this afternoon.
Let no worthless communication proceed out of your
mouth.
But that which is good to the use
of edifying as the need may be, that
it may minister grace unto the hearers.
Building communication skills.
How do we do it?
Do we ever think about the conversations that
we engage in?
Do we ever plan them under the spirit
of God?
When you meet somebody, where do you go
from there?
Well, I would like to suggest step number
one.
Step number one.
Take the initiative in asking meaningful questions.
Take the initiative in asking meaningful questions by
which you try to draw people out.
I'm sure you've noticed in the Gospels that
the Lord Jesus was always doing this, wasn't
he?
The questions of the Lord Jesus are a
study in themselves.
He never asked a question because he didn't
know the answer.
He asked so that we, the apostles, and
then we ourselves would get to know the
answers as well.
For instance, he said, Whom do men say
that I am?
That was a good question, wasn't it?
Whom do men say that I am?
He had come to the watershed of his
teaching ministry here on earth.
This is the experience in Caesarea Philippi.
He wanted the disciples to know in their
hearts who he was, because if they knew
who he was, then they'd be able to
face the cross and the tomb and all
that lay ahead because they know they were
on the winning side.
So he said to them, Whom do men
say that I am?
On another occasion, he said to the Jews,
What think ye of Christ?
Meaning, what do you think of the Messiah?
Whose son is he?
The idea is when the Messiah comes to
the earth, who will he be?
From whom will he be descended?
And of course, that was easy.
They knew he would be the son of
David.
Everybody admitted that.
But the Lord Jesus had further questions to
ask them.
He was not only David's son.
He was David's Lord, and he wanted to
impress that deeply on their hearts so they
would never forget it.
On another time, he asked a rhetorical question.
He said, Why call ye me Lord, Lord,
and do not the things that I say?
They didn't have to answer that one.
That's just a question that hangs there in
mid-air for men of all times to
contemplate.
Why call ye me Lord, Lord, and do
not the things that I say?
Well, now, we can take a leaf from
the book, a page from the book of
the Lord Jesus, and we can use this
method in building communication skills.
We can learn to ask intelligent, leading questions
that will draw people out.
You say, well, give me, for instance.
Well, you meet a person, and you can
say, I don't think I ever heard about
your conversion.
I'd be interested to hear about your conversion.
Hopefully, the person's a Christian.
You know, that's a wonderful thing.
No two conversions are alike.
There are features in common with all conversions.
But I'll tell you, it's a thrilling thing
to hear of God's dealings in grace in
the lives of men and women.
Isn't it?
Thrilling thing.
I believe that will be part of heaven.
I believe that will be part of what
heaven will be, an unfolding of the riches
of his grace, his kindness toward us through
Christ Jesus, and the wonderful weaving of God's
plan.
Well, you can start down here, and you
can ask a person, I'd be interested to
hear how you were saved.
I had the joy of meeting a man
this morning.
He's probably here.
Saved one month.
I'm sorry I didn't have time to hear
more about it.
Another question you can ask, and I find
it very helpful.
If you're talking to a Christian, have you
had any thrilling answer to prayer lately?
That's perhaps a little better than saying, when
is the last time you had an answer
to prayer?
I mean, that puts them on the spot
a little.
But maybe if you just word it with
velvet gloves, you'd say, have you had any
thrilling answers to prayer lately?
Well, actually, they are going on all the
time, and I do feel that we make
a mistake in our prayer meetings that we
don't allow time, some way or other, for
Christians to share the way God has been
answering prayers in their life.
You know, here's a man, and he's in
business, and he's lost his briefcase during the
week.
And they search high and low for the
briefcase, and it has important papers in it,
and they can't find it anywhere.
And he goes to prayer, and he gets
his friends to pray with him, his Christian
friends.
And in a marvelous way, God leads him
to the briefcase.
Well, I'd like to hear about that on
Wednesday night, wouldn't you?
To know that God is still in the
business of answering prayer.
And we live in a world of miracles.
I believe in miracles.
I really do.
They're going on all the time.
And when I say that, I mean things
that wouldn't happen according to the laws of
chance or probability.
And they do happen.
And I tell you, I don't want to
get away from that in my life.
I don't want to just succumb to the
chill of my environment and fail to rise
above flesh and blood.
I want to see my life crackle with
the supernatural.
I want to see it radioactive with the
Holy Spirit.
And I love to hear the testimony from
Christian people of what God is doing in
their lives as well.
Have you had any thrilling answers to prayer
lately?
Tell me about it after the meeting.
Another good question, I think, when you meet
your Christian friends, you can ask them this.
You can say, Have you read any good
edifying books lately?
You know, some of the great blessings that
have come into my life have come through
the reading of books, and usually books that
somebody has mentioned to me.
Years ago, I got down on my knees,
and I asked the Lord to be Lord
of my bookshelf, Lord of my library.
I said it like this, Lord, you know
that in my lifetime, I'm only going to
be able to read a certain number of
books.
And I don't want to read fraud.
I don't want to read trivia.
I want to read books that will be
meaningful, that will change the direction of my
life.
Well, you know, God hears prayers like that.
He really does.
If we're really simple in our faith with
Him and mean business with Him, He hears.
And somebody comes along and says, Hey, brother,
I was reading this book lately, and it
really has been a blessing to me.
And I read it, and it's a blessing
to me, too.
Have you read the book Knowing God by
J.I. Packer?
Well, it's splendid.
I'll tell you, if you can write a
doctrine book, a book on Christian doctrine, so
that it stirs up the hearts of God's
people to go out and worship to Him,
I think that's great.
Knowing God by J.I. Packer.
Have you read Born Again by Colson?
It's a splendid book, really.
Splendid book.
Wonderful story of the conversion of that man.
Well, you can do this.
You ask people these questions.
You say, yeah, but supposing you're talking to
an unsaved person, what do you say?
I have to chuckle every time I think
of dear brother Paul Little.
He used to say to people when he'd
meet them and didn't know whether they were
Christians, Would you say you're a Christian or
on your way to becoming one?
Well, I don't know, but the ice is
broken, you know, and you can go on
from there.
It was my privilege in earlier days to
fellowship quite a bit with dear Dr. Ironside,
H.A. Ironside.
I was working in a bookstore out in
Oakland, and he was president of it, living
in Chicago.
And he used to come west from time
to time.
It was my privilege to drive him around
and be with him.
And he was like that.
He was always asking me questions as if
I knew anything about the Bible.
That was the beautiful part about it, you
know.
And I remember one day we were driving
over the Bay Bridge, and I was driving
and he was sitting there, and he said
to me, Bill, he said, did you ever
think about that verse in 1 Corinthians?
What do you think that verse means anyway
in 1 Corinthians 6?
And he quoted it from memory.
He said, verse 4 it is, if you'd
like to see it, the King James.
Don't look in another version, because it gives
the answer away.
It says in verse 4 of 1 Corinthians
6, it says, if then ye have judgments
of things pertaining to this life, set them
to judge who are least esteemed in the
church.
Set them to judge.
This is about Christians going to law one
against another.
Now, he said, isn't that a funny thing?
He said, set them to judge who are
least esteemed in the church.
He said, is that what you do?
Well, of course, he let me sit there
for a while in complete and utter ignorance.
I never knew there was a problem there.
And then he said to me, do you
think it might mean this?
Do you think it might be a question?
When you have these problems coming up among
Christians, do you set them to judge who
are least esteemed in the church?
And that is the men of the world,
the ungodly judges of this world.
Is that the people you take your problems
to?
People who are of no standing in the
church at all?
Well, I think if you have the New
American Standard Bible or some of the other
bibles, it makes it a question.
That's why I say it solves the problem.
But I didn't have it then, see?
But I'll always thank God for Dr. Einstein.
He was always doing that with me.
He was always asking me questions about the
Word, graciously, you know.
And after I'd think about it for a
while, and of course I didn't know the
answer, he knew I didn't know the answer,
but he wanted me to know it.
And then he would tell me.
And it's interesting, I think I could take
it to the place on the bridge where
that went on.
You know what I mean?
It's so vivid in my mind today.
What was it?
Oh, I think it was a spirit-guided
conversation, don't you?
The man knew something about building communication skills.
And he was there to help a young
believer in his onward journey.
Brother Davey, just before, we're down there singing
at Maybe Yet More, and he leaned across
to me and he said, what place did
music have in New Testament evangelism?
Well, I never thought of it before.
But I will.
And that's the very thing.
He gave an object lesson of exactly what
I was going to talk about in just
a few minutes.
Now, I don't think this will come to
you and me overnight.
I think it's something we have to develop,
don't you?
But what better way among Christian people than
when we come together to talk, to talk
about the things of the Lord, to talk
about the Word of God, to share blessings
that we've received, and to ask questions that
might bring up these things in the minds
of others.
That's the first step.
Then take the initiative in asking meaningful questions.
Number two, be a good listener showing a
sincere interest in what the other person is
saying.
That's good.
Be a good listener showing a sincere interest
in what the other person is saying.
It's so easy for us in a conversation
to listen with one ear, waiting for the
person to come up for air, and then
dive in with both feet.
But Paul says in Philippians 2, verse 3,
In lowliness of mind let each esteem other
better than themselves.
And so it's a good thing to be
a good listener.
There's a brother in Chicago, I won't mention
his name, very dear brother, and when he
meets you and you start talking, he hangs
on your words and you get the definite
impression that that's the greatest thing that's happened
to him all day, meeting you.
And you know, everybody loves him.
Everybody loves him.
It's a nice thing, a nice virtue that
he's sincerely interested in people.
He's interested in what you have to say.
He's really a people man.
And as I say, everybody loves him.
A good listener is not only popular, but
after a while he gets to learn something
too.
Everything you and I know today we've learned.
We don't have anything we didn't receive.
Isn't that right?
I often say, I don't think I've ever
had an original thought in my life.
I thought I did once.
And then I read Ironside on Ephesians 1
and he had it there years ago.
He really did.
I probably got it from there too and
didn't realize it.
A good listener looks at the person who's
speaking instead of letting his gaze wander all
around the room while the person is speaking.
A good listener doesn't interrupt with every random
thought that comes into his mind.
He doesn't sigh or yawn as if he
needed some nightfall.
And he responds with smiles and nods of
agreement whenever they're in order.
It's good to be a good listener, isn't
it?
It's good to be a good listener.
This is part of developing good communication skills.
Then the third thing I would like to
suggest this afternoon is always seek to edify.
You notice that in the verse that we
read.
Always seek to edify.
It says, let no worthless communication proceed out
of your mouth but rather that which is
good to the use of edifying as the
need may be that it may minister grace
unto the earth.
When I talk with you and you talk
with me we should have a mutual desire
to build one another up in the most
holy faith.
And incidentally in that connection we should try
to be a thermostat instead of a thermometer.
A thermometer reflects the temperature around.
A thermostat determines the temperature.
And when you talk you can determine the
temperature of the conversation.
Can't you?
Very, very important.
In speaking to people it's good to find
out their interests and seek to build on
that basis.
Try to make spiritual applications.
Some people have a real gift in this.
A subject comes up and immediately they see
a spiritual application.
I think Dr. Barnhouse was a master at
that.
I don't think there was anything in creation
that he couldn't see some spiritual application for.
And that's a great thing.
I may have told you told some of
you that one time I was standing with
dear Fred Elliott out in La Grange, Illinois.
He was visiting back there and we were
standing outside the chapel.
It was right near the Burlington Tract.
And we were standing there talking about the
things of the Lord after the meeting.
And as we were talking our conversation was
drowned out by the Burlington Zephyr going by.
You know, these two huge diesel engines just
went vroom right through the village there.
You know.
And after the noise was down Brother Fred
tapped me on the shoulder and he said
power, brother but nothing like the power that
raised him from the dead.
You see, I saw the Burlington Zephyr.
He saw the resurrection of Christ.
Good to be like that, isn't it?
Good to be able to make spiritual applications
from these things that come up in life.
And in that connection I think we all
feel lifted but we need to be reminded
of it that in our speech and in
our conversation we should really make a determined
effort to avoid trivia.
It's so easy when we get together and
talk to spend the time over things that
really aren't that important.
Right?
In fact, I brought along a little illustration
of it this afternoon and I'd just like
to play it to you and I don't
feel embarrassed because there isn't any of you
here but it might ring bells if this
tape recorder will work.
Most tape recorders are demon possessed.
I hope this one isn't.
Okay, let's listen carefully and I hope it
will come over with sufficient volume.
It's such a shame that you weren't here
for Sally's wedding.
Let me go back.
That was my fault not the tape recorder.
Larry, did you have a good vacation?
It was such a shame that you weren't
here for Sally's wedding.
Did you hear about it?
It was really something.
You would have loved the men's outfits.
They wore that latest style for weddings.
Purple tuxedos.
Isn't that fantastic?
And you should have seen the shirts they
wore.
They were avocados green with ochre colored ruffles
down the front.
Ochre?
Well, you and I might call it muddy
orange but you know Sally.
She always says things just right.
The ochre was to please the groom's mother
because that was the color of her dress.
Oh, and their shoes?
Mary, have you ever seen avocado colored lizard
skin shoes?
They rented them for the occasion, you know.
Sally's mother told me that and I guess
we better not say too much about it.
You know how critical people can be.
The bridesmaids were outstanding in their orange dresses
with lavender polka dotted ruffles and the bride
was pretty too.
It's the first time I've ever seen a
bride carrying hydrangeas.
But Sally certainly has a style all of
her own.
Oh, do you really have to leave, Mary?
I wanted to tell you about the reception.
Well, I hope that doesn't make you wish
you were at the wedding.
But it's an example of trivia, really.
And I ask myself, you know, a hundred
years from today, what difference will it make
that she carried hydrangeas?
And incidentally, you could have done that with
a man talking too.
Don't want to discriminate against the women.
You could have a man talking about the
baseball scores, caught up in a world of
baseball or anything like that, while above us
burns the vision of the Christ upon the
cross.
So easy.
So easy in our conversation just to be
taken up with trivia.
Now, you've been asking questions, you've been listening
to the person talk.
The time comes when you want to comment
too, of course.
And I think this is very important.
Maybe there's something that you can add to
what the person has said.
This is always a joy to us in
the work of the Lord, I think, when
we're up ministering the word of God.
And at the end of the meeting some
person comes with maybe a splendid illustration of
what has been said.
Maybe some balance of truth that we haven't
seen at all.
I tell you, it's a wonderful thing.
People commenting on what has been said and
adding to it, maybe making a correction.
And this is important too.
This helps us in our conversation and keeps
us from becoming people of extremes.
What else?
Well, I think it's a good idea to
praise whenever you can.
To praise whenever you can.
You know, a lot of people in a
lot of people's lives, very little sunshine comes.
And a nice thing every day to bring
at least some sunshine into a person's life.
But the difference between praise and flattery.
We should avoid flattery.
And sometimes in our efforts to avoid it,
we avoid praise too.
What is flattery?
Well, flattery is saying something to a person
that seems like praise and is utterly insincere.
Utterly insincere.
You don't believe it at all.
It isn't true at all.
And you go ahead and say it.
But praise is when it's genuine.
And the Apostle Paul followed this dictum, didn't
he?
And you've noticed it in his epistles.
Generally speaking, in his epistles he begins them
with something praiseworthy about those to whom he
was writing.
He doesn't have any in the epistles of
the Galatians that seems to be fire and
thunder there, but because of the doctrinal error
that was creeping in.
But even in the Corinthians, he could be
thankful to God that they were enriched with
all utterance and knowledge.
It was really not much credit to them.
It was a gift of God, the grace
of God.
And yet he finds time at the beginning
of his letters to drop a word of
praise and encouragement.
And this is a great thing to people
today.
Then in our conversation, we should be positive,
not negative.
You know, didn't Alph Gibbs used to speak
about the person who was born in the
objective case and the kickative mood?
Something like that.
Well, we don't have to be like that.
We can be positive, not negative.
We can be thankful, not complaining.
Ephesians chapter 5, and verse 4.
Ephesians chapter 5, just quickly, and verse 4.
It says, Neither filthiness nor foolishness, talking or
jesting, which are not convenient, but rather, giving
of thanks.
What a wonderful thing to be filled with
thanksgiving day by day.
People like to be around a person like
that.
Now I'll turn this tape over and the
rest of this message is on the other
side.
Chapter 5, and verse 4.
Ephesians chapter 5, just quickly, and verse 4.
It says, Neither filthiness nor foolishness, talking or
jesting, which are not convenient, but rather, giving
of thanks.
What a wonderful thing to be filled with
thanksgiving day by day.
People like to be around a person like
that.
Another thing in our conversation with one another,
a danger to avoid is the danger of
jumping to conclusions.
I hear a person for a while.
I think I know what they're going to
say.
Then I barge in some very helpful comment.
I completely missed the point.
That wasn't what they were talking about at
all.
It's so easy to do that.
We jump the gun.
We don't listen until a person is through,
and then we just miss it.
Now, I have a little illustration of that
that you might like to listen to, and
it might help to fix it in our
minds.
That's the wedding still going on.
Okay, here we go.
Don't jump to conclusions before you hear all
the facts.
A lady invited several friends to a mushroom
steak dinner.
When her maid opened the can of mushrooms,
she discovered a slight scum on the top.
Since the guests were expected at any moment,
the lady suggested, give the dog a little,
and if he eats it, it's probably all
right.
The dog licked it and begged for more
so the dinner was completed.
After the main course, the maid came in
to serve the dessert, but her face was
ashen white.
She whispered in her employer's ear, Ma'am,
the dog's dead.
There was only one thing to do, and
the lady did it.
She called the doctor to come with the
stomach pump.
Sometime later, the guests were reclining after the
doctor had left in various stages from the
use of the stomach pump.
The lady called the maid and asked, Where's
the dog now?
The answer came, Out on the front steps,
Ma'am, where he fell after the car
hit him.
Well, I think you get the point, don't
you?
Wait till the person gets through to say,
then come into the conversation.
Building communication skills.
What else should we think of in this
connection?
Well, the scripture has another admonition for us.
In Ephesians, chapter 4, 15, it says, Speaking
the truth in love.
I like that.
You know, the balance of scripture is absolutely
marvelous.
Speaking the truth in love.
The Lord Jesus always did that, and then
marveled the gracious words that proceeded out of
his lips.
Just speaking the truth without love is a
very one-sided testimony, isn't it?
Just speaking in love without the truth is
of no value at all.
The perfect balance is this.
Speaking the truth in love.
And in that connection, there's another verse of
scripture that says, Let your speech be always
with grace, seasoned with salt.
That's in Colossians, chapter 4, verse 6.
Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned
with salt.
Think of the Lord Jesus.
John, chapter 4.
He said to the woman, Give me to
drink.
I'll tell you that was grace.
For a Jew to say that to a
Samaritan woman, the Jews have no dealings with
the Samaritans.
He said, Give me to drink.
Grace.
A few verses down, he said, Go call
thy husband.
Now that was the salt, wasn't it?
That was the salt.
He didn't do that to embarrass her.
He didn't do that to hurt her.
He did it to convict her of sin,
that she might be brought to the feet
of the Savior.
Give me to drink.
Go call thy husband.
Another occasion, he said to the woman caught
in the act of adultery, Neither do I
condemn thee.
That was grace, wasn't it?
He said, Go and sin no more.
I love that.
That's the salt.
And incidentally, I see in that an indication
of the absolute deity of the Lord Jesus.
I think if you and I were saying
that, we would say, Neither do I condemn
thee.
Go and sin just as little as you
can.
Jesus couldn't say that.
The Lord Jesus couldn't say that.
God can't say that.
God said, My little children, these things write
I unto you that you sin not.
Praise God, he adds, and if any man
sin, we have an advocate with the Father,
Jesus Christ, the righteous.
God cannot condone sin.
God cannot tolerate sin.
And I love to read those words of
the Lord Jesus.
I know that he is God.
All right, another suggestion is this.
Try to, when we engage in conversation, try
to involve strangers or quiet persons in the
conversation.
Also, children.
And almost every group of people, when they
get together, there are people who stay in
the shadows, stay in the background, don't have
very much to say.
Really, it's a courtesy and a kindness to
involve them, and oftentimes they have some very
wonderful contributions to make.
Also, children.
Well, I don't think I have to labor
this point, do I?
How much we learn from the boys and
girls, how far ahead they are, and what
insights God gives to them out of the
mouths of bathes and sucklings.
As thou ordain strength because of thy foes.
And I pray to God for the contact
I've had with boys and girls, and for
the subjects that have come up, and for
the meaningful questions that they have asked me,
things that I never thought of before in
my life.
You know, this is very important on the
mission field, too.
Sometimes the national believers resent missionaries because when
missionaries get together, they'll speak in the presence
of the nationals in the English language.
They won't bother to translate it for the
nationals, and sometimes the nationals are just neglected
in the conversation.
Well, the Lord Jesus would never have done
that.
With all the fuss that there has been
in this country about the Watergate tapes, really
it's quite an object lesson to us to
be careful with our conversations, isn't it?
Be careful in the use of tongue.
The tongue is found in a wet place
and very apt to slip, isn't it?
Another thing that we should do is avoid
being a compulsive communicator.
I don't know whether this is a nervous
reaction with us or what, but many of
us are just compulsive talkers.
We have to be at it all the
time, and the Scripture is filled with admonitions
on this subject.
Let me read a few of them to
you.
Proverbs 10, verse 19.
It says, In the multitude of words there
wanteth not sin.
What does that mean?
I think it means the more I talk,
the more I just prattle on, the more
danger there is of saying something I shouldn't
say.
Especially when people are trying to top this
one.
Somebody tells a story, somebody else tries to
top it.
In the multitude of words there wanteth not
sin.
He that hath knowledge spareth his words.
Proverbs 17, verse 27.
Ecclesiastes 5.3. A fool's voice is known
by the multitude of words.
And then that lovely word in James chapter
1, verse 19.
Be swift to hear, slow to speak.
Isn't that good?
Be swift to hear, slow to speak.
Somebody has prayed this prayer.
Lord, fill my mouth with worthwhile stuff, and
nudge me when I've said enough.
Good prayer.
Somebody once introduced Thomas Edison as the inventor
of the talking machine.
And Thomas Edison got up and corrected the
introduction.
He said, I'm the inventor of the talking
machine that can be stopped.
That was the difference.
The first talking machine that can be stopped.
Another key, building communication skills.
Avoid lying or exaggeration.
How easy it is to exaggerate.
Sure, that's a failing with many of us,
even in Christian work.
You know, reporting the results of the last
campaign and the last crusade, the tens can
easily slip into the hundreds.
You've heard that one, Mother, there's a hundred
cats in the yard.
John, I've told you a thousand times not
to exaggerate.
Shun gossip, backbiting, and slander.
Brother, Bram Hall will be speaking about tongues
and the tongues in 1 Corinthians chapter 14.
And it's been a subject that's caused horrific
division, of course, among Christian people.
But I want to tell you something that
really bothers me, and that's this.
That a person can be a gossip and
a backbiter and be in good standing in
the assembly.
And it shouldn't be.
It shouldn't be.
We react and rightly against anything that causes
division in the assembly by way of charismatics.
But I think we should react just as
strongly against gossip and backbiting, don't you?
And certainly just as wicked as the abuse
of tongues, if not more so.
Bill Gawthard, in his seminar, defines gossip as
sharing private information with others who are neither
part of the problem nor part of the
solution.
Good.
Sharing private information with others who are neither
part of the problem nor part of the
solution.
Lord, deliver us from gossip.
Deliver us from evil speaking of others.
Deliver us from backbiting.
And deliver us from idle words, remembering that
men will give an account for every idle
word that they utter.
And don't be a boaster.
I was telling the Christians this morning about
that time when this matronly lady steamed up
to Winston Churchill and said, Mr. Churchill, I
don't think I've ever told you about my
grandchildren.
And he said, no, and you don't know
how happy I am.
Don't be a boaster.
Avoid swearing and profanity and minced oaths.
Minced oaths are the Christian sins in this
regard.
Thou shalt not take the name of the
Lord thy God in vain, for God will
not hold him guiltless but take of his
name in vain.
That means you don't swear by Jesus Christ.
It also means you don't say Jee, which
is a contraction of Jesus.
It also says you don't say Jeepers Creepers,
which is a contraction for Jesus Christ.
It means you don't swear by the heavens,
because it's the throne of God, or by
the earth, because it's his footstool.
Doesn't it mean that?
It means you don't say darn, because darn
is another, it's a minced oath for damn,
and when you darn a man, you damn
him to eternal fire in your heart.
It's an awful thing, isn't it?
Damn you.
That means I wish you were damned.
Well, darn is a minced form of that
same expression.
And there are all kinds of those words
that are used today, and they should be
eliminated from the Christian's vocabulary.
A policeman was asked by the judge what
the prisoner said when he was arrested, and
the policeman said to the judge, Leaving out
the bad words, and the judge said, By
all means, leave out the bad words.
He said, Absolutely nothing.
That's the world today, and that's what Christians
have to work in the midst of, and
we are polluted by it, and we have
to go to the Lord for cleansing from
defilement.
I remember a dear brother, Dunlop, in Cleveland
years ago.
He was a contractor, a builder, and this
day he went out to the job where
they were building, and he parked his car
there by a bend in the road, and
as he was leaving the lot and going
back to his car, he heard a man
say something he in writing either, and
the man said, Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Dunlop,
I'm sorry I said it.
Mr. Dunlop went to his car, and just
before he got to his car, another car
came around a bend and just smashed his
car to smithereens.
If he hadn't stopped to talk to that
man, he probably would have been in the
car.
He told me that story, and I never
forgot it.
He was a sensitive Christian.
He spoke to the man about it, and
it probably saved his life.
Finally, avoid sarcasm and unkind remarks.
Death and life are in the power of
the tongue.
You know, one of the quirks of fallen
human nature is that we're often most unkind
to the people we love the most.
Isn't that true?
You know, a young person, for instance, can
go out and lean against the fender of
his Mustang and be so charming and outgoing
with his peers, and he can come home
and he can really be terrible to live
with.
It can be true.
Terrible to live with.
A poet said, One great truth in life
I found while journeying to the West, the
only folks we really wound are those we
love the best.
We flatter those we scarcely know, we please
the fleeting guests, and deal full many a
thoughtless blow to those we love the rest.
Will that speak to my heart?
How true to life that is.
May the Lord help us in the use
of our tongue, in our conversation one with
another, that no worthless communication can proceed out
of your mouth, that which is good to
the use of edifying as a need may
be that it may minister grace unto the
hearers.